Stupid stuff in the morning. Introducing the CP (Cheese Platter) crew.
Automatically chose Camembert for Carolyn because of the episode “Ipswich”, but for the others I went by corresponding characteristics:
Edam/Arthur - sealed in a layer of red or black. Travels well and does not spoil.
Emmental/Martin - riddled with imperfections which makes it distinct.
Cheddar/Douglas - sharp, firm. Ages well and gets sharper in the process.